Pumpernickle Sandwich

It was a warm sunny afternoon,
Beautiful flowers were in bloom,

As I sat and took it all in,
My oversized stomach got to growlin',

I thought to myself, "Self, I need some eats,"
Maybe a steak and potato, or chocolate-coated sweets!

So I heaved my body up off the green grass,
Finished for now, watching time pass,

I stroll to the kitchen and look for some food,
I get a little agitated and start to come unglued,

my agitation rapidly transforms into pure dread,
Because all I see is ham and pumpernickle bread,

WHERE THE F---'S MY BEER AND STEAK AND POTATO?
WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN DOING YOU STUPID F-----G H--?!

B----, GET IN THE KITCHEN AND BAKE ME A PIE,
BEFORE I GET PISSED AND DOT YOU IN THE EYE!!!!

-Random-